Thursday, March 29, 2007

Eat my Dust You Insensitive Buck

Stephanie and I walk from my office to AAC. We heard that 15 minutes after tip-off, all tickets are dramatically discounted. This is not true. So we resort to scalpers. One scalper has a pair of tickets on the floor but they're $110 each. We tell him we have $30 each. 15 minutes later, he caves and we get the tickets. Stephanie gets the credit for driving a hard bargain. We're not sure exactly where Section 111 is but we find out it is where the mAAniacs are. Only we pass them on our way down to Section 111, Row AAA, Seats 1 and 2. That's those folding chairs next to the basket. Here's my view from our seats and a very vague glipse of Dirk before he got hurt. I actually majored in photography at one point in my life. You would never know because I obviously keep my mad camera skills very well hidden.

We got in at the end of the first quarter. It unreal how close we were. That Avery Johnson has got a set of lungs on him. Also, right as I made the comment "I'm afraid they're gonna put us on the jumbotron right as we're making dumb faces" Stephanie looked up to see us on the jumbotron.

The weirdest part was that we were right there and neither of us saw how Dirk got hurt. We watched the replay as well and still couldn't see it. He did not look like he was in pain at all. My money was on a minor case of food poisoning but obviously the ankle injury is always the safe bet.

Stephanie high fived Champ the mascot when he was walking back to the tunnel and we learned that the cheerleaders will not give shirts to people like us. But I also witnessed firsthand Jason Terry's ability to whip the crowd into a frenzy and it is unreal. Also unreal was how for the last 3 minutes of the game, the place was going nuts. Everyone was on their feet. I've never heard such a deafening mob before in my life. The gasps that went up each time Diop or Stackhouse missed one of their free throws in those last two minutes were terrifying. But in the end, the Mavs won and we all got free tacos. Also, I got an Acme Brick sign and a foam finger and they were passing out posters of Avery Johnson. It's a triple exposure picture of him first yelling, then acting pensive then sort of half-smiling and it says THE GENERAL on the bottom.

The only con of the night (other than Dirk's "ankle" injury) was the security guard by the score table. More than any Mavs player or mascot or cheerleader or coach, I wanted to say hello to Bob and Mark mostly because I feel like certain overused phrases of theirs have made it into my everyday vernacular. So we went by the score table while they were off air during the post-game locker room comments. Our main goal was to tell Bob that indeed, one of these nights one of those will go in. We're standing there a few rows behind them when Mark looks over at us and stares for a solid 10 seconds during which our only recourse was to smile back and try to not look demented which I think we acheived. Then Mean Security Guy comes up and talks to us like we're there for a retard convention. His actual quote, "Bob and Mark are working. They have to work now and you need to leave." But I took a picture as we were being ushered out which is another jewel in my photography crown:

Wednesday, March 28, 2007

Courtesy of the Red, White and Blue

ARMY OF ONE? More like just a big group of assholes.

While everyone gets their panties in a knot about SUPPORTING THE TROOPS, this kind of shit is not only allowed but condoned. Here's the deal: I feel very sorry for kids who were too poor to afford a higher education or who fell for the whole WMD/"they hate our freedom" schtick and signed up to fight and die just to line some already wealthy people's pockets. I can only hope that the Veterans Services get their act together to take care of the ones that survive and come back.

That being said (and I may add that I come from a military family full of Army veterans), just because you're in the military does not mean you automatically get my respect. In fact, the infrastructure of the US military seems to be composed mainly of bigoted and/or small minded douchemonkeys.

I can only imagine what kind of hard sell the US Army's gonna have to come up with after this clusterfuck of a war has exposed just how shoddy the Army is.

Tuesday, March 27, 2007

That's nice. Only 9 other times in NBA history since 1954 has a team swept a 6 game road trip. There's got to be someone keeping track of which records the Mavs have broken night by night.

I like it when the Mavs margin of victory is larger than the number of years I have been alive. Is it weird that the most thrilling moment of the whole game was the ally oop dunk Croshere pulled off early in the 4th quarter? I know part of the impetus for me starting this blog was to mourn the loss of Keith Van Horn and for a while I thought Van Horn's skill-less spirit would live on in the form of Austin Croshere. But he's really improving and growing on me.

Devean George is still rusty but it's so good to see him back in there. It's also weird to see Ager on the scoreboard.

I can't promise anything but I *MAY* be at tomorrow night's game against the Timberwolves. So if you've kept up with any of my sign ideas I've discussed here on my blog you will know which signs to look for on TV tomorrow night. Keep Austin Weird has not ceased being hilarious to me.

Sunday, March 25, 2007

That's right, 27 days left until the playoffs start. 17 games left for the Mavs. And they are two victories away from tying the franchise season record for wins.

All that said, there was no excuse for the slip-up in the middle of the 4th against Atlanta. The Mavs lead should have never gotten below 15 much less tied. They dominated the whole game and the Hawks are the lowest scoring offense in the NBA. I guess they can afford to phone a few in and as long as they're ready for April 1 against Phoenix. The good news there is that as I type this, Sacramento aren't cutting Phoenix any breaks.

I don't know if I've really made my feelings clear on this issue but let me go ahead and say it. I don't think that Dirk has proven beyond a shadow of a doubt that he deserves the MVP. I think Dirk is an amazing player and some of the things that he can do as a 7 footer are astonishing. I adore the fact that (though it is probably not helping him in the MVP race) he doesn't showboat. I savor those fadeaway jumpers that he sinks with such ease most games. But the Phoenix game on March 14th did show me that Steve Nash is truly an amazing player who is capable of single-handedly turning a game upside down. Clearly I love the Mavs as I can't imagine someone creating a blog to discuss a team they are not passionate about. And I can't stress how highly I regard Dirk Nowitzki. But frankly, I think he's made it clear that the MVP race is not a high priority for him which only makes me respect him more. I like my team because they are a team and the greatest reward in a team sport is a championship. So I kind of wish people would knock off all the MVP talk. Give it to Nash. He deserves it and he's not an asshole (there's a couple of stories there for another day) so I say give it to him.

Though I may check on the availability of the URL for sometime in the next 27 days.

Friday, March 23, 2007

I think parquet floors only look appropriate in hotel ballrooms. I know it's kind of Boston's "thing" but it really just looks like their contractor did the old bait and switch when it came time to lay the floors down.

God, Jason Terry is rad. These Eastern Conference games are messing me up because I don't get adequate post-work decompression time before game time. But if it gets us 70 wins by the time the regular season is over, I guess it was worth it.

Thursday, March 22, 2007

We won. LeBron sucked. I discovered that "Cavs orange" is my least favorite color. Devin Harris' three pointer with 0.6 seconds left in the first half was rad. Especially as it was the third Mavs 3 in a row. Not that exciting of a game but after the Phoenix game, I guess I should savor these lazy games.

Imagine if part of your job description was "must be able to coerce Dirk Nowitzki into lip synching and wearing an Amish beard while playing jingle bells." Sometimes when I think my job is really cool, I remember that there's some girl in Dallas who gets to make the Mavs do retarded things all in the name of cheap jumbotron entertainment.

Wednesday, March 21, 2007

Alright folks we have another record. The Mavericks have now tied the all-time NBA season record for most games won in a 45-game stretch with 41 victories heading into their first 6 straight road games trip since 2000.

Last night's game was funny to me if you think of it in comparasion to the Golden State game last week. The Knicks are dwelling in the bottom of the playoff-contenders rung in the Eastern Conference yet I can't say they had much of an answer for the any of the Mavs calls. Yet Golden State, who also reside in the bottom of the playoff gang in the Western Conference, owned the Mavs last week. You can say "Well, the Mavs really have a hard time against Golden State. And Don Nelson knows the Mavs too well." But it really proves to me that the West is really just a much tougher conference.

All that being said, I actually like Stephon Marbury. As insignificant as it is in the long run, the idea that an NBA player would actually endorse a shoe for kids who can't afford Jordans or whatever is pretty rad in my book. And though I've never been a sneaker kind of gal, the shoes are pretty sweet too. The fact that he isn't paid to endorse them and only takes a cut of sales is good too. And the fact that he gave a free pair to every high school varsity player in NYC. Basically, he's not Jason "I beat up my wife" Kidd or Ron "I abuse my dogs" Artest.

Devean George and Greg Buckner are game-time decisions for Friday's game in Boston. I've missed them. As long as Buckner NEVER wears that mask again. And party/bonus, Cleveland lost in overtime to Charlotte.

Sunday, March 18, 2007

SXSW 2007: Bringing Down Austin One Elks Lodge at a Time

Wednesday March 14

Get to Austin and check into my Motel 6 room that I have to stay in for one night. They give me a handicapped room. The sink is approximately 2 feet from the ground. I have to sit down to brush my teeth. It's raining really hard. A few coworkers and I have a team meeting at the Hilton on the covered porch. While we're sitting there, a group consisting of four dudes dressed up like Grateful Dead roadies or cosmic cowboys or whatever the fuck they think they look like are standing across the street being interviewed by a TV crew and having their picture taken from multiple angles. One of my coworkers point out that they look like douchebags. I agree but there is a nagging suspicion that I know the douchebags in question. I feel bad for calling them douchebags when they turn up at The Theater Fire soundcheck and I realize they are VietNam. I broke up a fistfight between Josh from VietNam and my friend Mark back in 1998. I digress.

Go back to Motel 6 for a shower and watch the first half of the Suns-Mavs game. Go to Room 710 for the Theater Fire showcase. They have the game on. I realize that I can't handle a double overtime game in conjunction with South by Southwest. I choose to watch the game until the bitter end. I am sad when we lose. I get drink tickets and I am a little more happy. Then I find this written on the wall in the women's bathroom:

Mike is the lead singer of the Riverboat Gamblers and also an apparently underloved man. Brothers and Sisters play at 1am but there are few people there and they sound pretty bad. Lots of Allman Brothers Band references are made, mostly by me. Then back to the Motel 6 where I fall asleep watching ESPN.

Thursday March 15

My mission statement for this year's South by Southwest was to be in the same room as Zach Galifinakis as much as possible. I kick off this mission by going to the Filter party. I walk into the bar and proceed to knock back a few morning beers (well, it's actually a little after 1pm at that point) sitting next to Zach. Free Miller Lite = "breakfast" thanks to Filter. It's about 85 degrees outside with 198474658% humidity. I have already heard all the jokes Zach does at the Filter party and even he admits that "it really sucks to stand up here and try to make people laugh at 9 am in the hot sun."

I write notes on coasters about how bad the bands are. I leave the Filter party and go to Waterloo Ice House. After the Theater Fire set, we find ourselves hanging out in the parking lot drinking beer next to the Theater Fire van which in turn is parked next to the Albert Hammond Jr./Kings of Leon van. I say hello to Albert Hammond Jr. who I kind of knew a few years ago and still share some mutual friends with. Then the Scion people give us all free baseball hats which leads to this:

I like to think that my friends are a lot more fun to hang out with than some guy from the Strokes or Kings of Leon. My theory is further proven when Sean spits chewed up french fries at Nick's wife Kara. I check into my much nicer new room at the Sheraton on 11th then meet my coworkers at the Snocap party at the Four Seasons. Open bar. My boss takes us to some sports bar where we eat BBQ sandwiches and watch the Duke-VCU game. I was rooting for Duke because I think underdogs are overrated.

Went to Emos where I saw the two of the three best sets of the entire festival by the Octopus Project and Voxtrot. I also see the Gossip whose records usually bore me. But I can't deny that they put on a good show. Beth takes off her dress and sings the final song of the set wearing nothing but black bra and panties. Despite what you think of her "big girls need love" thing, you gotta admit that in this "thinness is next to godliness" world we live in, it takes serious balls to be that comfortable with your weight. But it also reminds me that the Gossip seem to be more about personality and crazy live shows than actual songs. Hung out with my old boss during the Voxtrot set and ate something from a wagon/stand/vehicle as I stumble back to the hotel after the show.

Friday March 16

Headed out at noon to Red 7 for the Mess With Texas party. There is a line about 400 people deep and the doors haven't opened yet. I go to Beauty Bar next door and thirty minutes later the line has dwindled. I get in and have another beer breakfast. I see what turns out to be by far the best set of the entire festival by Dark Meat. It's Polyphonic Spree without the sunshine and rainbows but instead in their place are songs about bad acid trips and getting in trouble at school. Turn around and realize that Michael Showalter and I have the same sunglasses. He gives me a "yeah we're pretty awesome" sort of nod which is all the validation I need. Go inside to hear Andrew WK's lecture on happiness which is not as funny as it seems on paper. He is followed by stand-up sets by Eugene Mirman who proclaims himself a "taste maker" and determines what is cool and what is not cool. Goes over a few things that are cool and a few that aren't cool then takes "cool" questions from the audience. Someone yells out "Rick Moranis" to which he responds that Rick Moranis is actually the only completely neutral thing in the world or as he said "Rick Moranis is like an alkaline and a base" which I thought was pretty true. Michael Showalter did a set in which he played "guilty pleasures" on his iPod most of which were truly awful. One of the songs was "Drops of Jupiter" by Train. This leads to David Cross telling a story about an ex-girlfriend of his who used to sleep with one of the guys from Train and a voicemail the guy from Train left on her phone in which he describes a party he's attending as "beautiful."

I kiss up to the door guys so I can come and go as I please and skip the line. It works so I head to the Noisepop party which is hosted by Zach Galifinakis. I witness him eat a grilled cheese sandwich with such speed that half of the cheese and crumbs end up in his beard. I actually help him get the crumbs and cheese out of his beard which is like braiding the hair of a million strawberry scented unicorns in my girl brain. He does more jokes that I've heard a bunch but it's an excuse for me to stand on the side of the stage and giggle. And to take another picture of him in all his pudgy glory.

Go back to Mess With Texas where I end up seeing the Gossip again. I have had more than a few beers which leads me to give Beth a hug and tell her that I'm from Georgia too. While she had every right to tell me to never touch her or speak to her again, she instead gave me a big hug and we chatted about being from Georgia and she tells me what Jarvis Cocker's cologne smells like. When I start talking about what Jarvis Cocker's cologne smells like at length, it's time to go back to the hotel and take a nap.

I wake up and head to Cafe Mundi for The Theater Fire and O'Death. O'Death are also one of the top sets I see. Go back to my hotel in time to watch The Good The Bad and The Queen from the patio of my hotel. They are truly awful. End up at a Sony BMG party on the top floor of my hotel. Kelli and I decide to bartend because it seemed like a good idea at the time. Tom Morello from Rage Against the Machine is at the party but seemed uninterested in testing my Cocktail-esque skills. Kelli and I set up a tip jar and made some money. The cops come multiple times and finally around 4am, Austin's finest decide to rage against the party machine and shut it down. Shouldn't Tom Morello be more angry about this brutal abuse of police power? Aparently this is the face I make when someone from Rage Against the Machine is at the same party I am at:

Saturday March 17

Wake up feeling like I had been to a rave followed by boot camp followed by a kegger. Went to The Theater Fire instore at Bella Blue and am told that David Fricke from Rolling Stone is record shopping next door. He actually saw the Theater Fire play at Beerland last year so I take a CD to give to him. He hits on me which is what we call "taking one for the team." Go to OK Mountain Gallery party where I see Weird Weeds and Peter and the Wolf. Stand in what is essentially a backyard drinking keg beer and wondering if this is what my Dad pictured when I told him last week that I was going to a convention in Austin. Back to the hotel for a nap. Find out that I have scored a pass for the Vice after party at the Elks Lodge. Watch a totally unfunny Saturday Night Live then watch the first half of the Stooges set at Stubb's from the hotel patio. Sing along to the killer version of "Gimme Danger" in the car on the way to the Vice party.

This is where things get interesting. The Vice party is at capacity within a few minutes of us getting in. A few of us take to the dance floor for a fit of bad white kids dancing to Chromeo which smoothly transitioned into Technotronic's "Pump Up the Jam" which causes us to garner the attention of a Vice photographer. That's never a good sign. We take refuge on the rooftop patio and are yelling at friends in the now-100 people long line when I hear what I think is a car crash in the driveway. Then security starts running to the front of the building and we are all told to move back as quickly as possible. Someone says that a guy has fallen off the roof. What had in fact happened was that THE MOTHERFUCKING BALCONY HAD PARTIALLY COLLAPSED AND SENT METAL AND BRICKS PLUMMETING TO THE GROUND! Which leads us to speculate whether balcony collapse is a DO or DON'T. Once we find out that miraculously no one had been hurt, the apathy of the partygoers reached a fever pitch as pictures were taken and balcony collapse jokes were made with plenty of references to the Simpsons episode where they play tennis in the benefit for victims of Balcony Collapse.

Me, Kelli and Eric Courson celebrate the fact that we did not die at an Elks Lodge:

Everyone took refuge at the Purevolume party where we met a man from Lakeland, Florida who did the following things in no particular order:
- tell us that he found out his fiance was fooling around with his brother
- gathered us for a huddle where we piled our hands on each other's and yelled things
- showed us his picture ID repeatedly to prove he was 22 years old

As we left the party headed for our respective hotels, there was a very passionate group sing-along to "You Got Lucky" by Tom Petty. Because nothing's luckier than not dying on a rooftop.

Sunday March 18

Check out of the hotel and head home. Jamie Kennedy is on the radio in Austin clearly still very very very drunk. He's talking about coming to SXSW to hang out with his friends the Polyphonic Spree. Really? Do they travel in similar circles? Seriously? My mp3 player dies ten minutes outside Austin which leads me to navigate the vast wasteland of central Texas terrestrial radio. With a four day bender coming to a close and Movin' 107.5 finally coming in clearly around Waco, I had to agree with Movin' in their observation that "music makes you feel good." Chicken nugget kid's meals help too. Got home and commenced my yearly tradition of gathering all the random junk I have accumulated in my purse throughout the week and taking an inventory.

The picture above contains all of the following:

3 unopened Bud Lights
1 room service jar of grape jelly
17 condoms from the Vice party
1 SXSW wristband that someone left in my car
2 kazoos
8 parking garage validation tickets

Lessons I learned this year:

1. SXSW wristbands or badges are a complete waste of money
2. Brian Posehn hates me
3. Staying in a hotel downtown is totally worth the extra money
4. I wish I had the foresight to open a skinny jeans and ballet flats store on 6th
5. Damon Gough (Badly Drawn Boy) seems to be constantly confused and wanders around his hotel lobby with a street map
6. Balconies are not 100% reliable
7. Datarock, Dark Meat, Voxtrot, the Octopus Project, O'Death and The Stooges are all very good bands.
8. Without a wristband or badge I had *EASILY* the best time I've ever had at SXSW this year. And I spent about $50 total on cover charges to get into the few bands showcases that I really wanted to see or had missed their set at a free party. SXSW will never trick me into wasting $200+ dollars again.

Tuesday, March 13, 2007

Ok, I guess I shouldn't get so cocky about these things. God, the Mavericks just couldn't get anything going. Or as Bob Ortegel said, "It's like the Warriors have magnets in their hands that just draw the ball towards them."

How many turnovers did the Mavs commit? My abacus is in the shop and I lost count when Golden State had eaten up 20 points on turnovers. Even Pops was playing like a JV towel boy. And Dirk getting a technical from the bench was, while technically amusing (har har), not a good sign. Devean George is out again. Fuck.

At least we go into the Phoenix game tied with them for winning streaks. And if one more person mentions how "If you watch no other Mavs game this year, you have to see Wednesday's game against the Suns" I may call in a suspicious package at the AAC.

Did anyone notice that Don Nelson looked sober-ish? I'm going to just assume that yesterday was "Opposites Day" and put my liver in a jar next to my bed tonight to save it from itself for the next 5 days.

Monday, March 12, 2007

Phil Jackson sleeps alone tonight

About 5 minutes into the first quarter, I said "this is gonna be a tough game."

I was right. It was a very tough game for the Lakers. Tough and tragic for the Lakers.

Don Nelson, here we come. Hey Phoenix, 17 victories in a row is not *THAT* hard.

Sunday, March 11, 2007

Completely Non-Sports Related Local Scene Rant Post

Apparently, "SAVE DEEP ELLUM" is a mildly popular rallying cry these days. To that I say, "No thanks".

I have heard so much nostalgia about the supposed halycon days of nightlife in Deep Ellum. While everyone's entitled to their opinions, I can't say I'll miss Deep Ellum. I started going to shows in Deep Ellum in 1997 when I was 16 years old. My first show I went to was the Pavement/Bis show at Trees in 1997. My mom went with me to get me in and then leaned on a "tree" by the merch booth reading a book while I lost my little teenaged indie-infested mind. So it's now been ten years of my life that I have spent in a four block by seven block radius, though more like 9 because I've pointedly tried to stay away from Deep Ellum for the past year or so.

Deep Ellum just happened to be where the venues were. I never fell for what I felt was a delusional vision of Deep Ellum as some sort of East Village NYC early 1960's scene, Carnaby Street/Swining London of the mid 1960's scene or even a Sunset Strip early 1980's scene though the Hollywood cheese metal vibe seemed to bear the closest resemblance to Deep Ellum. For every cool local underground show there were 15 Hellafied Funk Crew/Pimpadelic/Reverend Horton Heat/Spoonfed Tribe shows. And for every Trees, Gypsy, Orbit Room, Club Clearview or even Galaxy Club there were many more Spiderbabies, G-Spot, The Rock, Curtain Club, Liquid Lounge or The Bone. Deep Ellum Live was a miserable place to see a show despite drawing some monumental acts.

All of that aside, the neighborhood has run its' course and is now just a horrible combonation of underage dance clubs, blocked off streets and abandoned storefronts. There's a good number of venues around town that provide a decent atmosphere and a fairly solid concert calendar and not a single one is in Deep Ellum. I still wish there was a venue in East Dallas that could draw some of the bands who have now either automatically written the metroplex off and just pass through on their way to Houston or Austin. Or at least a Dallas venue that could be considered comparable to the plethora of Denton indie venues.

From an economic development standpoint, I hope that some commercial development does start to happen in Deep Ellum if only for the fact that the D/FW suburban sprawl is not only enviornmentally detrimental but also wasteful resource-wise. There is an abundance of lovely older buildings downtown that could potentially be developed into multi-use structures that could include cheaper, hip apartments and condos for people my age as the older family-types are still afraid of downtown. Developers have learned that the penthouse condo buyers are all going to flock to Uptown. So the only way they can fill those downtown or Deep Ellum dwellings and re-engerize the area is to offer cheaper units (and the option to rent or own) to young professionals and artists. Mark my words: if Deep Ellum and Downtown ever manages to pull itself out of its' self-imposed slump, it will be due to new development not due to the efforts of some aging hipsters attempts to hermetically seal the area off and try to continue the party like it's 1999.

On a completely unrelated note, I have to complain about one other thing. The Theater Fire were lucky enough to be accepted to showcase at SXSW again this year. Bitchin'. Their showcase is Wednesday March 14 at 10pm at Room 710. What? Yeah that's right, their showcase is going to occur at the exact same time as the 4th quarter of one of the most highly-anticipated game of the Mavs entire regular season. If anyone is at The Theater Fire showcase on Wednesday night and hears someone yelling for a song called "Goaltending", that's me.

Tuesday, March 6, 2007

So my first Mavs game I ever attended was in Jason Kidd's rookie year. I remember that Sassy magazine had declared Jason Kidd the "New Sports Hottie" so when our youth group went to the Mavs game, most of my time was spent giggling about how cute Jason Kidd was. Which is odd because a mere 14 years later, I find myself wondering how I ever found him to be anything other than an unattractive jackass. Oh 1990's, you were such a wacky time!

Let's work backwards....

Devin Harris is running down the clock to what will obviously be a 10 point Mavs win and shoots a haphazard three pointer which actually goes in.

I was actually most impressed with the Mavs ability to block shots tonight.

I feel like pointing out that when the Mavs are in a tight situation or even three minutes from victory with the other team trying their hardest they can always just toss the ball to Dirk for something good to happen. To be honest, there's a lot about sportscasting terminology that I don't actually know how to effectively and accurately use so I can't really say anything about "clutch playing" until I take a class or something. I just heard the free throw line called the "pity stripe" the other day and laughed like a baby seeing Peek-a-Boo for the first time.

Every time I watch the post-game show and hear what new record the Mavs have set, I immediately compile my own personal montage. Usually it's from a not-yet-filmed straight-to-video 'tween movie starring Jay Thomas called something like Ball Hoggs wherein the Scranton Hoggs youth basketball team comprised of various scrappy social outcasts has some sort of special chemistry and suprises all the naysayers by coming from being last in the league to the championship finals. With the help of their coach's no-nonsense approach to teamwork and competition, though he is actually coaching the team as part of his community service for his multiple alcohol-related foibles, the Hoggs end up taking home either taking home the trophy or learning the keys to confidence and self-esteem. And I *think* Will Smith's son is the point guard for the team. Is that already a movie? Or is it just an mishmash of every sports movie?

Timberwolves beat the Lakers in double overtime! Jay Thomas! Remember when his character on Cheers was killed off in a Zamboni accident? I do.

Saturday, March 3, 2007

Ahhhhhhhhhh mater! Want Jet to always score 30!

You know how in Peanuts cartoons when any character got too excited or mad or frustrated they went "%*&$//"!!!

$%&%^#@#%;owefnq"#@req@(#u@ y^&@(*#$ *^y#$%q@(

That was in-fucking-sane! I can't hate Dwight Howard too much because I thought the sticker thing at the All-Star game was pretty rad. And any game that includes Austin Croshere getting a dunk, Jason Terry scoring 29 points and Dirk hitting 2 threes (or was it 3 threes?) in a row in the last two minutes to pull the Mavs out of their slump is a good game in my book. At 7 pm tonight I was thinking to myself "Who really wants to see the Mavs vs. Magic? I'm here near downtown so maybe I should cruise over to AAC and see if there's any cheap tickets left? Naaaaaah, I just bought some sun-dried tomato hummus and a clay face mask so I'll just go watch it at home since it will probably be a snoozer anyways."

Mark F. just pointed out that "some people" have said that the season is getting boring because the Mavs just keep winning. To that I say: "some people" also have sex with horses. I like winning. I never get bored of my team being better than every other team in the league. I have never gotten bored seeing which zany new franchise or league record another victory will shatter.

It brings to mind a bit of commentary from the Cavs game on Thursday. One TNT commentator (I haven't really bothered to learn their names since I have only within the last year quit referring to the guys back in the studio as "Charles Barkley and those other guys") said:

"Well, here's the Mavs record month by month this season and as you see they did not lose a game in February. I really don't think they're gonna improve as far as their record on a monthly basis going into March."

I totally agree.

Friday, March 2, 2007

Game? What game? Where's my truck?

I gotta level with you. I watched the game last night. We won by 3 which was too close of a margin for me. I remember LeBron's two desperate last minute attempts at a three pointer with like 8 seconds left. I know they were not sucessful. I remember that crazy dunk he had in the first half.

Then I went to the Roky Erikson tribute at Doublewide. Then I woke up in my bed thanks to the kindness of the Strange Boys. And now I look look and feel like Roky. Actually, I'm pretty sure Roky is feeling a little less damaged than me today.

Victory hurts. Not as bad as that Livingston knee injury but bad enough for me to have started out today laying on the kitchen floor because it was marble and cool.