(sits here staring at my laptop and repeatedly mouthing the word 'wow')

To quote Patton Oswalt...

"Sometimes I thought, 'Yeah, I'm sooooo edgy.' Then this guy comes along and it's like, "Man, I'm nowhere near the edge. This guy has a cottage on the edge that he lives in year-round."


Thanks to Deadspin (Jesus, I should make a macro for that) for bringing to my attention this amazing pile of what-the-what brilliance. I would try to give you my slick and ultrahip witticisms on this but...well, uhhh....

Well, I've got absolutely nothing. I give up. Internet, you win again. You live in three-story Tudor bungalow centrally located on the edge (with great schools!) and I have nothing to add to this.

Me trying to say anything about this would be like Matthew Barney trying to explain the Cremaster Cycle but only being able to use the vocabulary of an autistic 5 year old to do so.

I think I need a lie down. And a hug. And a blankie. And perhaps a warm glass of milk. Can someone put Sesame Street on for me? Thanks.